Affiliate Disclosure: Some of the links on this page are affiliate links, which means we may receive a commission if you decide to buy a product or service we recommend.
This woman’s sister-in-law recently passed away, and her brother is grieving. He’s been invited to family events, but he often dissolves into tears by the end. In an attempt to prevent this, his sister made a rash decision that only upset him further.
Struggle with Grief
The original poster (OP), Sarah, has a brother, Jim, whose wife passed away recently after battling cancer. Shortly after, Jim has isolated himself from everyone for a few weeks.
Family’s Efforts to Support
It got to the point that Jim’s parents became worried about him and began inviting him to more family events. Being around family seemed to help Jim, but a new problem arose.
Unintended Awkwardness at Family Gatherings
The moment anyone mentioned Jim’s wife, he’d start to cry. Jim’s loss was so profound that it didn’t matter in what context his wife was being referenced. He would become emotional regardless.
Sarah’s Concerns as Host
Because of this, family gatherings with Jim present are awkward. Regardless of the event, it would inevitably be interrupted when someone mentioned Jim’s wife.
A New Host
Jim had broken down crying in front of guests a few times already. Sarah and her family took turns hosting different family events, and now it was her turn to host.
The Decision to Exclude Jim
Because of Jim’s previous breakdowns, Sarah and her husband were worried about hosting the next family event. They both concluded that it would be impossible for anyone to mention Jim’s wife at the next gathering, so they tried to think of possible solutions.
Breaking Bad News
Sarah’s husband suggested they leave Jim out of this event and let him stay home to get the necessary space to mourn. After careful consideration, Sarah called Jim to tell him she was canceling his invite to the next family gathering.
An Unexpected Reaction
After hearing he was uninvited, Jim was upset. His reaction surprised Sarah because she thought he felt “forced” to go to the past family events.
Sarah’s parents were furious when they discovered Jim was uninvited to the next gathering. They called Sarah’s behavior “disgraceful” and “unsupportive.”
Disagreements on Handling Grief
Sarah tried to explain why she uninvited Jim, but they were unsatisfied with her reasoning. Sarah’s parents told Sarah she was taking away the “comfort” and “support” Jim received from being around others.
Grief Isolation vs. Group Support
One passionate user stated, “Because heaven forbid you bear with a little awkwardness to come together and support and comfort your grieving brother, right? Sorry that his grief is such an inconvenience to you.”
Family Dynamics and Support
“His grief is going to be uncomfortable for people because it’s raw and real. He needs people to be able to sit with his discomfort to be supportive. It’s been weeks, not years. You are so unsupportive and dismissive,” another user commented.
The Importance of Compassion
“You’ve essentially said that your brother’s grief is inconvenient and bringing down the vibes, which is heartless and cruel. It’s only been eight weeks,” someone exclaimed.
Seeking a Resolution
Sarah was left with mixed feelings. Her husband claimed Sarah’s parents didn’t care about their guests feeling uncomfortable watching Jim break down crying. Only time will tell if they can come back together as a family to support each other.
Father Seeks Daughter’s Inheritance Share for Newborn, Tensions Erupt After Unpleasant Response
This is the story of a young woman who inherited her grandparents’ estate after their deaths. Her father demanded some of the money to support his pregnant wife after he blew through his own inheritance — and showed his true colors when she refused.
He Repeatedly Pressures Wife to Spend Her Inheritance, so She Takes a Stand at New Year’s Eve Dinner
Spouses should support each other in times of crisis. Instead, this woman’s husband has been taking advantage of her inheritance since her mother’s death. His whole family expected her to pay for things until she finally put her foot down.
He Purchases a New Home and Car With Inheritance, After Discovering News Ex-Wife Seeks Justice
A man received a good chunk of money after his grandmother passed away. While he and his ex-wife had been co-parenting successfully, when she heard about his newfound wealth, she started making demands.
His Late Mother Repeatedly Ignored His Funeral Advice, Now He Refuses to Pay
After his father’s death, this man advised his mother to think about her own funeral. She repeatedly refused. When she passed away with no arrangements in place, his siblings were upset to learn he didn’t want to contribute to the funeral costs.
Woman Fights to Protect Her Children’s Future as Boyfriend’s Parents Eye Her Inheritance
A woman plans to use her inheritance to set up a good future for herself and her children. However, her boyfriend wants to use the money to help out his parents, who have made poor financial decisions in the past.