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Life often knocks us down when we least expect it.
We’ve all been there. However, instead of feeling pity for ourselves, we can bounce back using proven strategies that have worked for others.
Let’s review some tips you can try the next time you feel like throwing yourself a pity party.
Put It on a Calendar
One user suggested, “Get a calendar: put all your important dates on there, birthday, anniversaries, etc. Now sit back with your SO and look at all the empty dates/weekends on there. Next, put plans on the calendar.”
There’s something special about putting things on a calendar. Maybe it’s that things are more likely to get done.
Try putting a special event or a short meeting with a close family member on the calendar, and watch yourself look forward to spending time with your loved ones!
Start Small
Change isn’t easy. If you want to make meaningful adjustments to your life, it’s best to start small. List the changes you want to see in your life and start with your top one.
“Change usually takes a lot of time, patience and self forgiveness. A good start would be to make a list of the things that you want to change about your life, write down the advantages for the change, the disadvantages for not changing, and then rank them from 1 to 10 with 1 being the perceived easiest change,” another user remarked.
Take a Shortcut to Happiness
A user commented, “Often we think about what is missing in our lives and we imagine what it would take to fulfill those things. The answer usually comes in the form of money or the time that ample money would afford us. This is a trick.
“Instead try imagining how you feel with those new things, then ponder why you aren’t feeling this way with all that you have. Constant competing for more (very American thing) is the opposite of ever being happy.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting the security that money can provide. However, if you don’t know what truly makes you happy, no amount of money will ever feel like enough.
Build Something
“From personal experience, build a thing. More complex the better. Best if you don’t know how to do it before you start,” one user said.
Sometimes, we just need to stimulate our minds with something new. Why not build a Lego set and work your way up to building a custom PC?
You’ll learn something new and feel a sense of accomplishment for what you’ve built.
Try Random Hobbies
Another user commented, “I started a Coach to 5k program to get back into shape, along with weight lifting twice a week. Literally two weeks in and my zest for life is back. Less anxiety, good sleep, the minor aches and pains are going away (now it’s just sore muscles) and I feel like my procrastination is disappearing.”
Often, it may feel like we’ve seen or done everything, but this is far from the truth. Try taking a class at your gym or traveling to a different part of town. The thrill of finding something new you like could literally be around the corner.
Volunteer Your Way to Happiness
Someone remarked, “Find something you care about and volunteer. You can do it as a family. Helping others is probably the most fulfilling thing you can do imho.”
Go to the VolunteerMatch website or your local animal shelter and find ways to volunteer. You’ll not only feel good, but you’ll get to meet new people along the way. You never know what opportunities could arise.
Plus, you’ll get good karma points.
Be More Decisive
Where you are at the moment is an accumulation of all your decisions. Decide now where it is that you want to end up. How do you want to feel?
Now, each time you wake up, take actions that will take you closer to this reality.
“Be purposeful in your day to day actions. You’re asking for very broad advice but you need to understand that life is the sum of all your decisions. You need to make more decisions that effect [sic] you positively than those that keep you back,” commented a passionate user.
Therapy Doesn’t Make You Crazy
“Free yourself from a goal oriented mindset, it is an internal problem and not an external one. Yes, money and vacations are important but even if you get to those milestones the emptiness and anxiety will come back.
“You need to look within, maybe there is something eating inside of you that makes you want to focus on goals to keep you distracted. I would recommend seeing a therapist.”
Similar to going to the gym, it’s important that we exercise our emotional well-being. Try multiple therapists until you find one that you work well with, and watch your happiness soar.
Don’t Forget the Basics
“…1) Stretching and doing kinda light workouts daily like you used to do in Physical education class in 2nd grade …. just get moving …..2) eat a bit healthier, 3) get outside in the sun…”
So many of us simply roll out of bed and hop into the shower to get ready to go to the office. Instead, try waking up 15–30 minutes earlier each morning.
Use this time to stretch or get a light workout in. Who knows? Maybe you’ll get hooked and wake up earlier. Taking the time to read or learn a new skill is something that will contribute to your happiness.
Embrace Life’s Stages
Instead of feeling pity for yourself because you want more in your life, embrace your desires. Most people go about their lives settling for what’s in front of them.
While there’s no “right” way to live life, you’ve decided to want more. The fact that you stumbled upon this article is a sign you’re heading in the right direction. Keep asking for more, but be prepared to work at finding your answer.
“Here’s the thing though. Not everybody is awake to that question. You are. You haven’t numbed yourself, you haven’t given up on life, and you haven’t tried to ignore the question.
Life Is Simple
A user said, “Read Krishnamurti and see that you don’t need to accomplish or change or become anything. Still go overseas to learn and explore the beauty of life, but all of us are so insanely conditioned to live life in terms of our accomplishments. We need to pursue them, we need to savor them and broadcast them.
How about living life? It sounds simple, but instead of chasing goals and money, opt for a life worth exploring.
Travel to different countries. Meet new people. Life’s short; why not make the most of it?
Choose to Live a Nomadic Life
This is a bit extreme, but if you’re young or don’t have family obligations, why not rent an RV and travel around the States?
At worst, you can return to your normal life. Or you may discover that traveling to a new place each week is something you enjoy.
“Sell everything and move into an RV and travel,” one user remarked.
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