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A grieving mother struggles as her troubled daughter demands her share of a recent life insurance payout. Conflicted with her daughter’s unpredictable behavior, she hesitates to give her the money, fearing it may worsen the situation.
Parenting Struggles After Tragic Loss
The original poster, whom we’ll refer to as Lucy, is a recent widow who unexpectedly lost her husband and son.
Navigating Grief and Troubled Relationships
Now only her daughter, Iris, remains.
However, since losing her father and brother, Iris has had difficulty moving on.
Challenges of Parenting a Grieving Teen
Iris lashes out at Lucy and runs away from home for days without contacting her.
She has no job, sleeps all day, and doesn’t help Lucy with anything around the house.
Coping with Loss and Unresolved Emotions
In an attempt to help her daughter, Lucy has tried taking her to therapy without luck.
Despite grieving two major losses, Lucy also had to find a second job to continue paying the bills.
A Family Struggling Financially
Even when Lucy’s husband was alive, their family lived on low income.
However, things would soon change.
Financial Windfall and Parental Concern
Lucy received a large sum of money from her husband’s life insurance. Naturally, she shared this great news with Iris.
The Complexity of Inheritance
Iris immediately demanded to know how much money she would be receiving. After all, she knew her father had included her in the will.
Refusing to Give Money to Unwell Child
Lucy refused to give Iris money—not for selfish reasons, but because she was genuinely concerned about Iris as she had been acting out the past few months.
Making Tough Choices for Daughter’s Well-Being
In response, Iris told Lucy that she would move out and get a lawyer. Word spread within Lucy’s family, and when Lucy’s sister-in-law found out, she told Lucy she was “stealing.”
Parenting in Crisis
Now Lucy is left feeling torn. She would happily give Iris a portion of the money if she was healthy.
Technically She’s an Adult, Right?
“[If the] kid is an adult, if they are a beneficiary of the life insurance policy, you do not have the legal authority to withhold the money from them, no matter your opinion of their mental state,” one reader said.
“If they blow the cash, it is their problem.”
A Mother’s Rightful Concern
“Daughter is clearly grief stricken and on a bender,” another wrote.
“Giving her a huge monetary amount right now would be insane. She’ll either escalate the bender and do something dangerous, or just squander the money in dumb ways and regret it when the dust settles. Her mother is right to be concerned.”
Facing Harsh Reality
“Unfortunately, it seems that your daughter wants to grieve away from you and your house, which is probably full of painful reminders of her old life,” another person commented.
“If she wants to move out, and she has money, you’re gonna have to let her, even if it worsens your own grief. I’m so sorry you are in this position.”
Striving for Stability and Emotional Healing
Losing two loved ones at the same time can take a huge toll on anyone, as it did with Iris.
Lucy appears to be genuinely concerned about her daughter’s well-being, but is she right to withhold her money?
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