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This woman helped her sister-in-law plan her wedding despite her bridezilla tendencies. However, when her sister-in-law went too far and made a cruel remark about her dog, everything fell apart.
Hostile Relationship With Ella
The original poster (OP), Jane, has faced hostility from Ella, her brother’s girlfriend, for over three years. Despite the bad blood between them, Jane had to endure her because her brother was in love and it would hurt him if they did not get along.
Ella makes harsh remarks about Jane’s weight and makeup. She also despises animals and always made rude remarks about Toasty, Jane’s dog, whenever she saw him.
Unanticipated MOH Role
Surprisingly, Ella asked Jane to be her maid of honor after becoming engaged to Jane’s brother because she didn’t have sisters or many girlfriends. Since her brother seemed happy, Jane said yes.
When Jane accepted the position, she was unaware it entailed overseeing the entire wedding—scheduling jazz bands, florists, and venues. Even worse, Ella expected Jane to pay for everything, promising her parents would repay her the entire amount before the wedding.
Ella’s Emotional Unraveling
Fast forward to the three weeks before the wedding, when Ella started being difficult. She couldn’t go a few minutes without hurling insults. Unfortunately, Jane had to work closely with her since it was a crucial time for the wedding preparation.
Ella’s Cruel Remark and a Hurting Memory
One day, Jane asked Ella about payment for everything she had ordered for the wedding. The innocent question set Ella off, unleashing a barrage of harsh comments toward Jane.
Things peaked when Ella questioned why Jane needed the money since her dog had recently died from cancer.
The Breaking Point
Jane was dumbfounded and quietly left the room without arguing or fighting with Ella. Then Jane contacted all the wedding vendors to cancel any deposits made with her card. After over 20 calls, only Ella’s wedding dress and flower arch remained.
Once everything was canceled, Jane felt compelled to explain her decision to her brother. She told him he and Ella would be responsible for covering all expenses and that the vendors would contact him directly. Jane also confirmed that she wouldn’t be attending the ceremony.
While she appreciates that her action was a little harsh, she couldn’t continue to watch helplessly as Ella mistreated people. She feels horrible about ruining her brother’s special day. Nevertheless, she isn’t sure if she is entirely to blame.
Recommendation for Self-Care and Reflection
“…Now, OP, since you probably aren’t going to the wedding, that block of time is still freed up,” one person mentioned. “Why don’t you take a day or two and go someplace special…”
Someone else incredulously added, “I have NEVER been a dog person, but I would NEVER make a statement like that. That’s just plain mean…”
Balance Between Family Support and Financial Accountability
“This is very telling,” another user advised. “If her parents were supposed to reimburse OP for the deposits and her canceling them while giving the vendors the brother’s contact, there should not be a problem with her parents just putting down their card or reimbursing their daughter.”
Jane should establish boundaries and avoid hostility from Ella or anyone else. Despite feeling guilty about her choice, most people support Jane’s decision.
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