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Two roommates lived peacefully for the first few months until one’s boyfriend decided to move in for the remainder of the lease. The boyfriend refused to pay rent despite having the money to do so, leaving the other roommate desperately trying to escape.
Roommate Dynamics
The original poster, Stella, moved in with Leah, her roommate, several months prior. Everything was going well until Leah had a change of plans.
A Sudden Change of Plans
Initially, Leah planned to move in with her boyfriend, Adam, after her one-year lease was up, but she “changed her mind last minute.”
Leah and Adam decided to stay at her place—where Stella resided—for the remaining six months.
Stella’s Concerns Over Rent
Here’s where tensions started to rise.
Stella thought it was unfair for Adam to live in their apartment rent-free for six months.
Negotiating Rent Responsibility
Adam offered to pay utility bills, which would be a significantly lower contribution than splitting the rent.
Also, Stella felt Adam would drive up the utility costs because he’d be working from home.
Work-from-Home Challenges
On top of this, Adam’s job involves constant loud meetings, so Stella would struggle to work from home during these periods.
A Suggestion for Fair Rent Distribution
Adam planned on sharing a bedroom with Leah.
When Stella offered Adam a spare dressing room to conduct his work meetings, he refused.
Unpleasant Messages and Accusations
Things went downhill when Stella asked Adam to pay one-third of the rent.
Both Adam and Leah started sending Stella unpleasant messages.
Accusations of Manipulation
Leah and Adam told Stella she was “greedy” and shouldn’t make this a big deal because she spent a lot of time at her boyfriend’s place.
Stella Seeking Perspective
“The weirdest part is they both have this stance of suggesting that I’m ‘going through something mentally’ and that by doing this, I’m pushing them and all my friends away?,” Stella said. “They’ve also both condescendingly wished me luck in getting through whatever I’m going through and [hope] I get better soon.”
Unresolved Rent Dispute
Fumbling in an awkward situation, Stella offered to vacate her place so Adam could move in. Stella would then move in with her boyfriend.
However, Leah and Adam refused this option.
The Option of Stella Vacating
“She can call the landlord/rental agent and negotiate her removal from the lease,” one person said. “Tell them that she wants out of the lease due to the roommate trying to move her boyfriend in while not putting him on the lease or making him responsible for a share of the rent.”
Passive Aggression and Manipulation
“Some serious manipulation going on here,” another said. “They’re basically trying to emotionally blackmail you into letting this happen by saying your ‘mental health’ is the reason you said no.”
A Puzzling Situation
“Wow, they are being pretty passive-aggressive with their comments,” a third person said. “Well, trying to be passive and failing.”
Strained Relationships and Living Arrangements
The strange part is that Adam has a well-paying job and comes from a wealthy family, so paying one-third of the rent would not have been an issue.
Plus, this would’ve been less than what he spent at his place.
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