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Mike Rowe has been prolific in shedding light on the Dirty Jobs that Americans do daily, but he didn’t catch everything. So we created this post to ensure job-seekers don’t step on these occupational landmines.
This list proves that jobs don’t have to be dirty to be crummy.
1. Medical Test Subjects
Also known as human lab rats, medical test subjects have one of the highest-risk occupations in the United States. The job requirements are a lazy person’s dream: take a pill, and hold still for an injection. And hopefully, you’re part of the placebo group, in which case being a medical test subject becomes a cushy gig.
But the workplace hazards are second to none. Your finger might fall off. You might grow a new finger. You might get cancer. Simply put, medical testing is a job fit for a rodent.
2. Streaming
There’s one Ninja. In the grand scheme of the internet, Pokimane is an anomaly. Even if you’re a ranked Call of Duty player or an attractive female gamer, many fish in the streaming sea are chasing the same amount of subscriber dollars.
You could make more money working the soda stream at the local Sonic than streaming yourself playing video games.
3. Sign-Holding
Sign holders (and their more talented form, sign spinners) are the human equivalent of the dancing monkey. Standing on the side of the road with a sign in your hand is easy enough, but one asks, “What’s your dignity worth?” Surely more than ten bucks an hour.
4. Multi-Level Marketing (MLM)
Even if you can make good money selling beauty products, supplements, or jewelry through multi-level marketing (MLM), how well will you sleep at night? After all, most MLM participants will lose money they can’t afford to lose. That’s just the nature of pyramid schemes—the cash flows to the top. If you’re at the top, you’re exploiting the bottom.
5. Renting Out Your Property
Airbnb was just the tip of the iceberg. Now, services allow property owners to rent virtually anything to a stranger, whether it’s an electric scooter, Xbox, automobile, or handbag.
It’s called peer-to-peer renting, and it’s a bridge way too far. If you find yourself renting out your gaming console or Kate Spade bag, it’s a sign you can’t afford it. And no, letting strangers use your stuff isn’t “income.” It’s a bad look.
6. Internet Surveys
Many of the “jobs” that seem too easy to be true are just that. Taking internet surveys in exchange for cash is no exception.
You typically get paid what you’re worth in the United States. Unfortunately, anyone with an internet connection, eyesight, and a pointer finger can complete internet surveys. Therefore, you’ll spend lots of time for very little money if you try to make a living answering questions online for a living. It also typically involves signing up for many things and being flooded with emails.
7. Stockbroking
There’s a reason why licensed stockbrokers, hedge fund managers, and financial advisors make the big bucks. Their job is hard, and many financial analysts are astute.
Your E*TRADE or Robinhood account should complement your salary, not serve as your virtual workspace. Unfortunately, when someone tries to make investing their full-time job, they often make moves to make moves. This frenetic approach to investing can make you into the anti-Robinhood—taking from your own pocket and flushing it down the drain.
8. Online Gambling
Honey, I just placed a can’t-lose wager on the Patriots, go ahead and put the deposit down on that mansion in Aspen. Aaaaaannnnd I’m broke.
9. Metal Detecting
If you’re one of the modern-day Blackbeards who fancies themselves a pirate, you might call it “treasure hunting.” Only in 2020s America would anyone consider bottlecaps and syringes buried in the sand “treasure.”
If you want to be a pirate and make real money, move to Somalia. Otherwise, these forum members say, “Put the metal detector down and get a real job.”
10. Real Estate Flipping
Watch one episode of Shark Tank, and suddenly everyone’s Barbara Corcoran, huh? The high cost of acquiring real estate means that many “flippers” have been ruined by unforeseen expenses, soft markets, and economic downturns.
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This article originally appeared on Financially Well Off.
